The Loneliness of China's Elderly
December 20, 2012
![Senior citizens play the violin and sing at a park in south China's Guangzhou Province. [Guangzhou Daily/Qiu Weirong]](/res/womenofchina/1212/图片2(2).jpg "Senior citizens play the violin and sing at a park in south China's Guangzhou Province. [Guangzhou Daily/Qiu Weirong]") |
|
Senior citizens play the violin and sing at a park in south China's Guangzhou Province. [Guangzhou Daily/Qiu Weirong] |
In their neighbors' eyes, Mr. and Mrs. Lu live an enviable lifestyle. Their son and daughter are both very successful in their careers and own their own homes. However, Mr. and Mrs. Lu refuse to move in with their children. Instead, they still live in their old house in Guangzhou. Without their children's company, going to the parks, recreation and tourism are their main sources of life satisfaction.
"I like the atmosphere here. We're friends with all our neighbors," says Mr. Lu. Both husband and wife are currently in good health and have no problem taking care of each other.
Every morning, they exercise at a nearby park and then visit the local market to buy vegetables. "We share out the household chores. Doing it alone is boring," says Mrs. Lu. In the afternoons, they usually play mahjong with their neighbors. "If we move to a different neighborhood, who will play mahjong with me?" she adds.
Mr. Lu was involved in foreign trade before he retired. During the course of his career he traveled all over the country and to many foreign places. Now in his twilight years, he is content to stay put and enjoy his life.
"When we are older, I will install an emergency alarm system. Right now, I am happy with my life. Without my children's company, I can still have happy twilight years," he concludes.
Money Does Not Equal Love
Today, the demands of modern life mean that most of the younger generation is focused on their careers, trying to open up their own piece of the sky. Crammed schedules and mounting pressure leaves them with no energy and time to show concern and support to their parents.
According to a survey by the Red Star Macalline, one of the largest national furniture mall chains in China, children's long absences from their parents' lives has become a widespread social problem.
Aside from workplace competition and rising cost of living, Chinese people's values have also undergone a significant change and many have come to see money as love.
The survey shows that more than half of the white-collar workers polled agreed that hard work and providing well for their family was the best way to show their love.
But according to Every One Is Well magazine's latest survey, 65 percent of senior citizens polled said that a need for their children's company exceeded any other material needs they might have.
According to the survey by China's leading home furniture retailer Red Star Macalline, more than 65 percent of senior citizens in China feel lonely. And medical studies have shown that loneliness can elevate an elderly person's blood pressure.
In fact, the time that we are able to accompany our parents is even less than what we imagine. About 70 percent of adult children do not live together with their parents.
Among 24.1 percent who live in different cities as their parents, the average time they spend with their parents is only 78 hours a year.
Long-term lack of communication also means that many people are losing touch with how their parents live. About 59.5 percent of people agreed to varying degrees that they don't know the details of their parents' day-to-day lives and that their idea of their parents' lives is still fixed in the past.
As times change, family values and simple pleasures have given way to the pursuit of success and money. In a fast paced world, it's easy to let our families slip to the bottom of our priorities.
Many people say, "I love my family and I want to provide the best life for them." But for most people, love is not money but time. Spending more time with your family not only tells them you love them, but can also bring more joy and happiness into your life.
(Source: news.xinhuanet.com/Translated and edited by womenofchina.cn)
Please understand that womenofchina.cn,a non-profit, information-communication website, cannot reach every writer before using articles and images. For copyright issues, please contact us by emailing: website@womenofchina.cn. The articles published and opinions expressed on this website represent the opinions of writers and are not necessarily shared by womenofchina.cn.
京公网安备 11010102004314号