Zhao Juanjuan's family has become renowned in Hejian, a city in north China's Hebei Province. Why? Zhao and her husband, Lou Kelin, both employees of State Grid Hejian Power Supply Company, have provided free matchmaking services to young singles for more than two decades. Zhao and Lou have facilitated nearly 100 happy marriages. Lou Junru, their daughter, has helped digitize the family's "database" of young singles, and that has enabled better and more efficient information management. With each person playing his/her part, the family has committed to voluntarily matching young couples, while also advocating for simpler, yet more innovative, wedding practices. In May, Zhao's family was one of the 10 families named "Most Beautiful Families" by the Publicity Department of the Communist Party of China Central Committee, and by the All-China Women's Federation.
Zhao's story, as a volunteer matchmaker, began with an introduction in 2003. At that time, Hongyue, her close friend, limited by a narrow social circle, had not found a suitable life partner. Zhao decided to play matchmaker, and she introduced Hongyue to Shengjie, a former high-school classmate. One weekend, she invited them to her home for a casual get-together. That meeting blossomed into a romance, and, before long, Hongyue and Shengjie were married. On their wedding day, Hongyue held Zhao's hand tightly and said, "Thank you, Juanjuan, for helping me find the one."
Initially, Zhao only played matchmaker for relatives and close friends, and she kept a record — entirely in her head — of all of their preferences. As word of her good matchmaking spread, more and more young people sought Zhao out for help. New clients included colleagues from her workplace, singles from neighboring villages, and migrant workers, who had moved to Hejian from other regions of Hebei Province. To meet the growing demand, Zhao prepared two thick notebooks, in which she carefully recorded each young person's age, occupation, education and family background, as well as hobbies, personality traits, and what he/she hoped for in a partner, and in life. That was when Zhao became a "volunteer matchmaker."
Targeted Matchmaking
Many people have asked Zhao her "secret" for success in making so many happy matches. Her answer? She treats every young person's search for love as if she were doing it for her own family.
"My hope is to help young people build a positive vision of love, marriage and family. I never rush to set them up. Instead, I take the time to have real conversations with them, to understand what they truly want — and need — in a relationship. Only then do I carefully assess whether two people are genuinely compatible," Zhao says.
She believes the foundation of a lasting marriage lies in shared values and mutual understanding, as well as a shared commitment to building a life together, with sincerity and trust. That is why, when making introductions, she values two things above all: Character and mindset; whether a person is responsible and hardworking, and respects their parents, and whether he/she embraces simpler wedding practices and holds a positive, healthy view of love and marriage.
"Their happiness is the best reward for me," Zhao says, with a smile. She still has contact with many of the couples she has helped. Many couples send her photos of their newborns and/or share news of their children's achievements.
Joined Forces
During the past two decades, Zhao has devoted her spare time to organizing matchmaking events, and to mediating relationship disputes — all without accepting any gifts or money in return. Behind this enduring commitment stands her family, each member of whom has her back. For Zhao, Lou Kelin is her chief adviser and logistics manager; their daughter, the trusted assistant.
Lou Kelin takes care of all household chores. He also helps gather and organize information on the young singles, he accompanies Zhao during home visits, and he helps his wife mediate conflicts, when needed. When shy, single men find it hard opening up to Zhao, Lou Kelin chats with them, from a man's perspective, to learn about their preferences for a partner, and blind spots in relationships. Lou Kelin then passes the details on to Zhao. His insights complement Zhao's perspective, which helps improve her matchmaking success rate.
During the early years, Zhao often hosted matchmaking meetings, in her home, on weekends and holidays. Lou Kelin would prepare fruits and snacks, and he would tidy up the living room in advance.
Lou Kelin has been by Zhao's side during late nights and difficult moments. "Whenever I come home late, there is always a hot meal waiting for me," Zhao says. "Sometimes, I am misunderstood when mediating marriage disputes, and I feel wronged and upset. My husband always listens, patiently, and he helps me sort things out. With him as my anchor, I can get through anything, no matter how hard it is."
Under her parents' guidance, Lou Junru has grown into a young, warm-hearted woman. When she was a child, she helped tidy up the living room after school, so her mother could host matchmaking meetings at home. When she was studying in university, she built an efficient, searchable database, digitizing all of Zhao's handwritten records. She also tagged each person's preferences, for quick and easy matching. She also suggested fresh ideas — including three-minute dates and themed social events — to inject new vitality into traditional matchmaking.
When it comes to "family education," Zhao says she and her husband must set a good example for their daughter, as Zhao believes parents' words and deeds can deeply influence their children. Also, Zhao and Lou Kelin never interfere with their daughter's ideas, and they encourage her to bring her ideas to life. When Lou Junru came up with her own ideas about matchmaking, Zhao and Lou Kelin gave her their full support. "It makes us prouder than any award to see our daughter follow in our footsteps and carry on the values of kindness and helping others," says Zhao.
New Vision for Marriage
Zhao joined the city's volunteer matchmaking team, organized by Hejian Women's Federation, in 2021. She has since been dedicated to promoting the new vision for marriage. Along with other volunteers, she has advocated for small or no betrothal gifts, and she has encouraged young couples to embrace simpler, but more meaningful, wedding celebrations. Zhao and other volunteers also offer counseling for relationship conflicts, and they organize lectures on modern marriage values.
In recent years, Zhao has witnessed a notable shift in local attitudes about marriage. In the past, many families prioritized betrothal gifts. Now, young people are placing greater value on common interests, shared values and mutual understanding. "A happy marriage," Zhao often says, "is built on a couple's shared commitment and hard work."
Earlier this year, Zhao's family was named a Most Beautiful Family. When asked about the honor, Zhao says, "This recognition inspires us to continue promoting the values of a happy marriage to more young people."
Photos from Interviewees and Hebei Women's Federation
(Women of China English Monthly August 2026)
Editor: Wang Shasha
