Hani people used to regard fire as the life of a family and respect fire so much that they always kept the kindling. Every family had several fires with different uses, which would never stop burning.

Hani people were in the habit of sharing their hunting achievements. Every family would be a part of it. The hunted food would be boiled and shared among all the people in the village.

There are many taboos in the Hani ethnic group's customs. For example, guests are refused entry into the house if there is woman giving birth inside. And, it is prohibited to lop the "dragon tree" or throw the garbage under the tree.

Hani people are hospitable. Guests are usually treated with wine. After the guests are seated, the host will first warm up a bowl of wine for the guests. During the meal, there are always non-stop wine and songs. When the guests are leaving, the host will present meat, bean curds and so on for the guests.

Public House

Hani people begin to change their clothes and appearance when they are 15 or 16 years old, which shows that they are adults and can have a relationship for marriage. They are free to participate in the social activities before marriage.

There are public houses for the girls and boys to enjoy their games and chatting. Only if they both accept each other, can they get engaged. Married people are not allowed to go to the public house or participate in  such social activities. Only if they divorce, can they enjoy the same rights as the unmarried people.

Hani people take relationships for granted and like to establish a relationship through a banquet. After winning girls' agreement, boys pool money to hold a banquet for themselves and their favorite girls. Different dishes are set on the table. The boys often prepare sticky rice wrapped with leaves for the girls. Such activities are usually held during their spare time.

Grabbing the Girl

Hani people used to keep the custom of "grabbing marriage." There are two kinds: One is to grab the girl, whom the party of the man likes, to the house of the man without any agreement. The other is based on a free relationship. They plan the grabbing marriage in order to oppose the senior generation's influence.

On the day of the grabbing marriage, the party of the man invites several friends to wait in a chosen place. And the girl leaves her parents' control by using the excuse of work. She goes to the chosen place in order to be grabbed by her lover. The girl pretends to be horrified and cry so that the villagers and her parents know she is grabbed.

The girl will be hidden in a relative's home for one or two days. A third party is asked to go to the girl's home to beg for marriage. Her parents have to accept the begging.

Crying Bride

The marital custom of crying is that: the bridegroom goes to welcome the bride accompanied by his brothers and friends. With the approval of the parents of the bride, the bridegroom can take the bride away. The bride should cry all the time.

Three days before the wedding, the bride begins to cry to show her deep feelings with her parents and family members. The bride's brothers and sisters usually accompany her to go to the home of the bridegroom with the trousseau, including the boxes, clothes, beddings and farm tools. The bride holds an umbrella whatever the weather. Then singers will sing songs to send the crying bride away.

The bride should first offer sacrifices to gods and ancestors when entering the home of the bridegroom. The mother-in-law will have the first meal with the bride without anybody else.

Best Wishes

At the wedding banquet, the bride and bridegroom should have the chicken and the pork. Then they should make a toast to the guests. At that moment, the seniors of the Hani ethnic group will sing songs to bless the couple, wish for them to have a baby girl for the first birth and a baby boy for the second and also wish them a happy marriage. At the end of the wedding, an unmarried elder is forced to eat the pig's tail.

At night, the couple should distribute eggs, candies and cigarettes to the guests. All the guests, whatever man or woman, old or young, participate in the celebration for the whole night.

After the wedding, a ceremony is held to show the bride has become a member of the man's family. Then the bride should go back to her home to distribute sticky-rice food to her family members, neighbors and friends.

When the couple has their first child, they should live separately from their parents. However, there are still some harmonious families, whose three or four generations live together. The young should respect and listen to the old.

There are few divorces. A simple ceremony is held to mark the divorce. When having the divorce meal, a piece of firewood is placed in the middle of the table, which is to show the future disengagement.

(Source: chinaculture.org/Translated by womenofchina.cn)